How Time Flies

It's hard to believe it's almost another Christmas...almost the end of another year!
December 17 it will be 6 months since we found out I was carrying another baby.  Last week it was 4 months since we miscarried that baby.  I can't believe it's already been so long.
John and I decided not to do the Clomid yet.  It still makes me too nervous about the unknown factors.  I already have several large cysts on my uterus and ovaries, and Clomid has a very high risk of fast-growing cysts, the reason why I will have to have a monthly ultrasound while I'm on the drug.  If they could guarantee that I would get pregnant again, I would be willing to take the risk, but they can't. 
So, John and I are going to TTC naturally for about 6 months or so.  We are going back to the charting and temping and all that stuff.  If we don't conceive by this summer, then we will go back to the OB/GYN and start the Clomid, but for now, we're just hoping it works itself out.
If we conceived this cycle, we will find out 2 days before Christmas, which would make this one of the best Christmases ever!! But, if/when we do conceive again, we're not announcing it to anyone until after I see a doctor...that way there are no more "public" miscarriages.  This is the only ones our parents have known about it, and that made it even harder.  Hearing my mom burst into sobs on the phone when I called her as we were leaving the doctor's office was one of the hardest times of my life, and I don't want to do it again if at all possible!